Bert Cooper Drinks Youth Serum & Performs In Broadway Play!

This youth serum chops your age in half. So give some to Don Draper so I can date him, okay? Okay! Good deal. Apparently this serum also makes you sing songs from my favorite musicals to your business associates. WEIRD.

Note: Yes, I only just found out Robert Morse played J. Pierrepont Finch in the movie and on Broadway. So I got excited. But check this out - the clip above is from 1967, but Morse actually originated the role on stage on 1962. Mad Men Season 2 took place in 1962. So did Bert Cooper go see How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying in 1962? A rich ad man based out of New York City? Probably. Wonder if that was weird for him. Seeing his young self performing on stage and all.

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How Chris Nolan Incepted Us With Inception & May Be Taking Over The World

Note: Inception spoilers lie ahead. Do not read if you haven't seen Inception. In fact, if you haven't seen Inception, please close the computer immediately and go see it. Good deal!

Okay. So. This just happened. It's 4:30 in the morning now and I started writing at 3:50.

The first thing I remember is being in a hotel room. High in a hotel room, cause it's just me, a hotel room, room service and a tv. Fun! Then all of the sudden, I hear the zzzzt sound of a hotel door being opened and it's someone who I love very much, but was not expecting to see behind the door and someone who I don't want to see when I'm blazed out of my mind. So I ask what Person A is doing there! Person A had to see me. I explain that I'm really tired. Person A suggests breakfast. I say I don't think that would work and note how odd all of this is and think, how funny if I was dreaming...

Cut to: I'm a library with Person B and Person C.

(Back ground: Person B is an old friend of mine who recently got involved in a theater company I work with. Person C is the artistic director of the theater company. Person B works in theater at a high school and Person C is in the process of finalizing a deal where the theater company teaches, in some cases, theater to kids - we had a meeting yesterday where this was brought up.)

Person B tells Person C that the kids talk about the program all the time and they just love it, etc. etc. I interject, "Wait, didn't we JUST have that meeting yesterday?" Person C replies "Quick turnaround."

So I start thinking...about how earlier I thought I might be dreaming...

I then say "Okay, this might sound totally weird, but I LITERALLY have no idea if I'm in a dream or not right now, it's totally fucked up." And look to them for answers, for them to tell me I'm ridiculous. Blank stares. I suddenly feel threatened and terrified.

I think think - "where's my totem. fuck fuck, where's my totem? I need to know if I'm dreaming. If I am, I need to wake up."

I try to look at my hands, I can't see them. Something is wrong. I reach into my pocket and realize I don't have a totem, so what else, what else. The pocket! What pocket am I reaching into? What am I wearing? What WAS I wearing earlier? I can't see it. I then decide that my shirt must be made of my mother's name and my pants must be made out of my dad's name. But then I realize none of this makes sense, I can't see what I'm wearing & there is no such thing as a shirt made out of Elizabeth* or pants made out of Arthur* - this is a fucking dream.

So I say think, okay, WAKE UP! Things get shaky, but it works! I'm suddenly in bed!

But wait, it may be cause it's dark, but it looks like my bedroom in my parents' house, not where I sleep now. I then look to the side of the bed and see what may or may not be a foreboding figure standing in front of me, holding a weapon. I scream at the top of my lungs AND FALL OUT OF BED, hitting my stand up lamp on the way down.

I instantly wake up in actual real life, terrified, on the verge of hyperventilating. I turn the light on, get my cat, and write all of this down.

I'm not sure where all of this falls on the scale of positive vs negative ways a movie affects your life, but Inception played a role in my dreams tonight in a way bigger then "I dreamt about Inception."

I understood after seeing this movie, on a subconscious level, that what it was telling me about dreams was true. That I could figure out if it was real or not, that I could wake myself up, that telling my dream-mates that I think I'm dreaming is dangerous and - interesting that screaming & falling on the last plane of dreaming before waking up is what actually woke me up? We all know the "kick" on the first plane in a dream within a dream is what actually wakes you up. Well, we think we know this cause we saw Inception. And now it just happened in my dream.

Chris Nolan, I don't know what kind of genius mastermind you are and I hope if you do take over the world, it's a benevolent dictatorship. Because you just made some shit up in a movie and I DECIDED IT WAS FACT WITHOUT EVER DECIDING IT WAS A FACT. Which also happens to be what occurs when someone is incepted in your movie. When Inception occurs. You incepted me with Inception. You incepted all of us. And now for better or for worse, I am finding it easier and easier to recognize when I'm dreaming (something similar, but not quite as intense, happened a week or so ago). At this stage, being conscious of the fact that I'm in my subconscious freaks me out to much to stay there, and I always wake up. But if this movie is somehow singlehandedly building our minds up enough to be able to fully participate in lucid dreaming, which, who knows, could lead to the film's technology existing in real life? Which could lead to actual physical Inception? Which you could totally do with an army of top notch lucid dreamers?! Well that's a whole other fucking movie right there, isn't it?! Except real if it was real! But IS IT REAL?!

WHAT'S HAPPENING?!

I also happen to be so sleepy and tired with a brain that has yet to recover from all of the 8 hours of drinking and 3 hours of sleeping that occurred yesterday, that it's no wonder I was high in my dream. My brain can't even function normally in my subconscious. That's how tired I am. But maybe it's also this complete inability to keep my eyes open that allowed for such a deep sleep so soon after I turned the lights off. Two levels in after a half hour, if that, of sleeping?

I must know go back into the land of the unknown (and by unknown I mean very well known) of my subconscious and hope things go more smoothly this time. Dating Joseph Gordon Levitt, Rupert Grint, James McAvoy or Aaron Tveit would definitely be acceptable subject matter.

See you on the other side.

*Not my parents' actual names, changed for purposes of this story.

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Emma Watson Is The MOST Beautiful [TTLLTOT]

Today's entry in Things That Look Like That Other Thing?

Only a great face can pull that shit off. So congratulations, Emma Watson. You officially have a great face.

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AHHHHHHHHH LOST EPILOGUE AHHH DYING

Join me in hoping my boyfriend doesn't catch wind of this before I can tell him so I can watch his reaction to this answer-giving two minute slice of genius on toast bread happiness AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! And we still get 12 minutes once the DVD comes out?!!?!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Faint!

[Jezebel]

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Televisionaholic

Going to keep most of this after jump because I want to keep Megan Fox's acting and JGL on the front page for as long as possible.

(cross posted from But They Didn't Ask Me)

They say the first step is admitting you have a problem.  Lady and gentleman who read my blog, I have a problem.  I watch way too much television.  Case and point:  I visited Hulu.com as I often do when I have other things I should be doing and decided to give the pilot episode of SyFy's Haven a look-see.



I like Stephen King.  I like Maine in theory.  And while waiting for Fringe to return in the fall, I could use something reminiscent of The X-Files and every other crime fighting science fiction show ever.   Plus, Haven has that one actor from Six Feet Under and 24 with the great goatee that I saw in Santa Monica the other weekend.  Consider me sold.

The rest after the jump




Ten minutes into the pilot, our fish out of water FBI agent is having a somewhat heated conversation with the local police chief because this murder just isn't making any sense.  That's when I recognize the police chief.  He's the actor who played the coroner and title character in the Canadian crime show Da Vinci's Inquest.



He's a little grayer and puffier than when I last saw him bucking the system and fighting for his dead victims in Vancouver, but it's definitely him.  Although I lived in Canada for several years, the only reason I know and love Da Vinci's Inquest is because my Canadian grandmother stumbled across it at 4pm everyday on A&E.  The show was amazing, and not just because in Canada, the coroners are a cross between a homicide detective, American coroners who conduct autopsies, and judges who get to hold their own trials otherwise known as inquests.  Every episode was reminiscent of Homicide:  Life on the Street or Law & Order in it's prime when Sam Waterson aka A.D.A. Jack McCoy played the system anyway he could to get justice.  And Da Vinci himself was a brilliant alcoholic misanthrope who could banter up and down a scene with his teenage daughter.  Anyway, the show was amazing until Da Vinci got into politics, but back to the point-- this actor my grandma loves shows up in the middle of a crime scene on this new show Haven.

I immediately call my grandpa's cell phone, and when he answers and explains that they're out to lunch with some visiting family, I assure him it's an emergency and I need to talk to Grandma now.  Very confused and a little concerned, she takes the phone, and I start heatedly describing to her what I've just witnessed.  Da Vinci is on a new show that they absolutely have to start watching immediately, like during lunch if possible.  You see, not only do I watch too much television, but I know far too much about other people's viewing habits.  I know that my grandparents love procedurals, but especially the kind that are a little tongue in cheek and on the quirky side.  Haven is set in Maine with an absurd recurring cast of locals and the occasional death or dismemberment is seen as puzzling and troubling rather than earth shattering, and that's perfect as they really enjoy something with a body count and a sense of humor a la the long dead Nash Bridges or more recently Castle.

Doesn't get much better than Don Johnson and Cheech

Except for maybe Nathon Fillion and... can we replace her with Cheech?

Grandpa also has a thing for young, pretty professional woman who are too smart and too sarcastic for their own good.  This describes the blonde protagonist in Haven to a tee.  And Grandma loves paranormal undertones, but nothing as frustrating or vague as the supernatural on a show like Lost.  The strange phenomenon in Haven have a logical and clear if still fantastical explanation by every episode's end.  PLUS, there's a recurring role played by Da Vinci!  If the start of a television show tailor made for them isn't an emergency, I don't know what is!!!!

Grandma laughed, explained to visiting family what my call was about, and handed the phone back to Grandpa.  Grandpa laughed and asked me to email him the name of the show and when it aired so he could record it on his DVR.   A few days later, he emailed me back to say they loved it.  Just as I was starting to feel proud of my recommendation, my television viewing prowess, it hit me.  I watch way too much damn television.

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New Eminem video featuring Rihanna

The new Eminem and Rihanna single "Love the Way You Lie" has grown on me immensely. The first time I heard it I felt it was a little gimmicky but I've grown to appreciate its sincerity. "Love the Way You Lie" is a song about abusive relationships by two artists who have very infamously dealt with domestic abuse. Eminem has already rapped about his tumultuous relationship with his ex wife Kimberley Scott (who Eminem fans know as "Kim"). He's been criticized for his violent lyrics which include fantasizing about killing his (then) spouse. But Rihanna has been more subtle in her artistic references to her relationship with Chris Brown (who Rihanna fans know as "that unapologetic abusive motherfucker"). Her last album Rated R (which is insanely underrated) alluded to being heartbroken but also finding the strength to move on from a fatal relationship.

"Love the Way You Lie" is a big step cathartically and musically for both artists. Eminem's lyrics, although not his best, are piercing as ever but surprisingly tender. You can hear his desperation, anger, and ultimately his shame not just in his lyrics but in his voice. For Rihanna, it's her musical admission of how a seemingly sadomasochistic love made her stay in an abusive relationship. While this is something she has previously discussed in interviews, she's never allowed herself to appear so insecure and fragile as she does in this song. Even her newly cultivated bad ass girl image is toned down for the single's music video. With "Love the Way You Lie" Eminem and Rihanna give us an honest account of their individual experiences with violence and love. I don't want to assume I know the extent of their individual experiences; it's too easy to assume that they were on polar ends of the domestic abuse spectrum (Rihanna as the female victim and Eminem as the male oppressor). All I can do is appreciate that their song expresses how multifaceted abusive relationships are...and I can also appreciate its great hook!

As a bonus, the music video rocks. It features Megan Fox and Dominic Monaghan as lovers tormented by their intense, violent relationship. I know it's just a short music video but both their performances are great. The video will hopefully garner more attention for the efforts made by Eminem and Rihanna to be open about their romantic struggles and also their efforts to evolve as popular artists in an increasingly shallow, monotone pop music industry.

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On The Subject of Crushes

She hosted a Whiskey Party. LOVES.

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